Mr Baseball Designated Hitter

MR. BASEBALL DESIGNATED HITTER

Bud Light Presents Real Men of Genius
(Real Men of Genius)

Today we salute you, Mr. Baseball Designated Hitter.
(Mr. Baseball Designated Hitter)
Baseball's an intricate game of skill, strategy, and athleticism ... except for you. You just whomp the ball.
(Whomp that ball now)
Our question: What's it like to be a professional baseball player who doesn't even need to own a baseball glove?
(You're a star)
Still, we'd rather see you at the plate than some pitcher with a career batting average of .001.
(Couldn't hit a beach ball)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Sir On-The-Bench-A-Lot, because fielding, throwing, and running are overrated anyway.
(Mr. Baseball Designated Hitter)